Default Dialogue causes Disengagement

Default Dialogue causes Disengagement

Default dialogue causes disengagement.

This means being adaptive is necessary in 2024.

Workplaces are a hive of unique ‘personalities’ that are becoming more challenging for many people given their multiple work relationships.

Whilst we categorise personality and style, there is a layered complexity: age, culture, values, gender, to list a few.

Being unable to flex your strengths*, it’s like the hammer being used with everyone, on everything and in every situation.

You have a menu of strengths* available to borrow at any time and you are obligated to adapt your approach (if working with people).

It’s the unbending person that people leave … opposed to the role itself.

Today I’m working with 4 people and each of their preferred strengths couldn’t be more different resulting in their default dialogue causing disengagement.

My approach is to help them correct and change their usual comfortable communication course to enable them to relate more effectively.

❓What is it that people say and do that causes you to disengage? (This shines a light on what’s important for you.)

*Relationship Intelligence – 28 Strengths used to relate to others

Essentials for Relationship Building

In recent months, I’ve recorded the work of clients, their conversation contributions about their desire to be better leaders of those in their care and others in their workplace.

Using a prioritisation exercise, we have continually arrived at a few reoccurring relationship-building essentials.

Only today did I pull this work together and I’m excited with what has eventuated.

This could be a useful tool or conversation piece for your team of leaders.

Five relationship-building essentials:

⚡Energy – mindfully expressing and demonstrating behaviours that encourage a relationship-building environment

⚡Expectations – being clear, consistent, and communicating the connection of each person’s role to the vision and direction

⚡Empathy – connecting often and listening to understand; to increase awareness and intelligence of how people feel in their many relationships

⚡Encouragement – activating emotions and endorphins by communicating positively, providing feedback, and reassuring their value in the team and business

⚡Empowerment – enabling growth by giving trust, giving the work back, and giving support

(I promise, there was no requirement to use words beginning with E!)

Spend a few moments considering your responses to these two questions:

In your opinion, what’s essential for leaders to be doing to encourage relationship building?

What do people expect of you and your relationship with them?

A special shoutout to those who have worked with me in recent few months.

They're always quiet in meetings

They’re always quiet in meetings.

They don’t speak up.

When being engaged to work with team dynamics, I often find these two statements in the brief.

Do you have ‘quiet’ people on your team?

Do some people rarely speak up?

Because of bias, beliefs, and confirming behaviour, the dynamics of a team are never quite right:

·        context and history aren’t taken into consideration.

·        meeting management triggers uncomfortableness around the table.

·        communication preferences are ignored.

As leaders (that’s all of us in the workplace), please:

·        Take time to discover rather than judging.

·        Take in the details and data rather than consume all the oxygen in the room.

·        Clarify and confirm someone’s motivational drivers by asking them.

·        Please enquire, be curious, and bite your tongue.

Alternatively, you and your team can test drive the Core Strengths assessment, Strength Deployment Inventory and you’ll have these details at your fingertips.

Imagine knowing why some people are quiet in meetings whilst others do all the talking … and what to do about it.