To tackle a challenge, especially one which reoccurs and is yet to be conquered, you’ve got to stop and ask, "Why - Why is this happening to me or better still, why am I allowing this to happen to me?"
Is it a health challenge, a relationship challenge, a career challenge or maybe you can’t even describe the challenge? That’s tough. I offer this Model to work through as an individual however I use it as a self-awareness tool for people developing their leadership.
The FEAR Model in a nutshell:
Fail or Fault: Describe and identify the challenge. Is it a physical ability which you are failing or is your mind activity at fault – internal self- talk controlling your inaction.
Edit Mind Play: If it’s non-physical – write down the internal conversation and then, edit the script. Adopt affirming language and rewrite how you think about the challenge. And talk aloud – have a conversation about it with others – you may need professional help.
Ability: If it’s a physical ability at fault, identify the specific skill-set or attribute or maybe it’s a competence - which you can then address through a learning mechanism e.g. training, coaching.
Results: To avoid recurrence you need to set goals and measure results. Hold yourself accountable (you’re an adult) – practise the skills, edit the inefficiencies and focus on measuring your change and results.
This model can be a quick coaching conversation or you can use it on yourself.
If you wish to read a book, I recommend ‘Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway’ by the late Susan Jeffers – this was her first book published and it helped hundreds of thousands of people conquer their challenges.